The Last Word

WHEN CHILDREN HURT

"Elder Abuse is a single or repeated act, or lack of appropriate action, occurring in any relationship where there is an expectation of trust that causes harm or distress to an older person”. (WHO)

The unearthing of the shoddy state of affairs at the State-run old-age homes in Goa by social activist Michael Ferns and his GCWT team has brought to the fore not only apathy of the government towards such institutions but also the extent to which funds from the public exchequer are swindled by various authorities in the garb of providing care-taking facilities to the needy.

It has exposed the inhumane behaviour and attitude of the government employees drawing huge salaries from the exchequer, not for performing their duties ethically, but for abusing the elders. It has brought to the fore the abuse of our elders at the hands of state-funded abusers. That the loot of the exchequer in such a fashion is unpardonable but worse still is the lack of accountability and responsibility of the government to provide training to caregivers employed by them to look after our aging parents.

While Michael told me that action against those involved in the abuse of the inmates has been sought from the government and that the government has assured to put things on track in these institutions, we can only wait to watch whether the assurance will finally translate into action.

So we spoke about the problems, and we did offer solutions. We told the government what it should do to make a difference in the lives of its senior citizens. We reminded them that they are the ones who fought/contributed to the welfare of our state/country and therefore they should be deeply respected.

We told the government that they need support and their voices need to be heard. We also told the government that more such institutions should be provided. Yes more such institutions should be provided, so that we, adult children, continue shirking our responsibility of looking after the ones who gave us life. We told the government what it ought to do, but did we tell ourselves that the abuse of our elders happened because we abandoned them in old-age homes? And moreover, abuse does happen at home.

The recent report by Help Age India, after surveys conducted in various states including Goa, has shockingly revealed that in India where respect for elders is the cornerstone of family values, the abuse of elders by family members is on the rise. The report states that the son is the primary perpetrator of abuse followed by the daughter-in-law. The report highlighted economic exploitation faced and disrespect further stating that more elderly women as compared to men faced abuse. Elder Abuse is a global social problem and the cause of many of the cases can be traced to having no respect for the elderly, pressure of living and pure greed. 

Shamefully, a country like India and a State like Goa, where respecting elders is part of the culture, has been forced to enact laws to stop people from abandoning elderly parents; or, to ensure that children pay 'parents maintenance' and penalty to the children of abandoned elders, can be fined or even put in jail. These laws are brought in because of the swelling figures of adult children abandoning or refusing to help their elderly parents. Therapists for years have listened to patients blame parents for their problems. Now there is growing interest in the other side of the story: the suffering of parents who are estranged from their adult children.

I recall a story I wrote in the Times of India (Govt has to provide shelter for abused elders, TNN Jun 25, 2009) about one Vincent D’Souza who was a victim of elder abuse. Suffering from a severe prostrate illness, he was reconciled to take shelter at a day-care centre in Margao, and was forced to spend nights at a friend's house in the village which he continued to do for over four months, before we could offer him help. He told me that he had lost his wife to a brief illness and as he returned home after her funeral, the 68 year old was shocked to find out that his house was illegally occupied by a relative at the behest of his son and daughter-in-law. There are a number of reasons for estrangement or abandonment of elders within the family systems both from the childrens' point of view to the parents, however the problem is assuming mass proportions. While experts suggest a multi-disciplinary and multi-agency approach, I feel that awareness has to come about.

Goa has The Maintenance & Welfare of Parents & Senior Citizen Act, 2007 in place which ensures need based maintenance for parents and senior citizens and their welfare thereby providing the elderly citizens a legal safety net. Besides other things, the Act provide for •Maintenance of Parents/Senior Citizens by children/relative made obligatory and justifiable through Tribunals. •Revocation of transfer of property by senior citizens in case of negligence by relatives. •Penal provision for abandonment of senior citizens. •Establishments of Old Age homes for Indigent Senior Citizens. •Adequate medical Facilities and protection of life and property of Senior Citizens. 

Under this act, children who abandon their parents or elderly relatives can face a three-month jail term. The law makes taking care of the elderly in the family a legal, and not just moral, obligation. These laws can be successful in getting rid of elder abuse provided the government lays emphasis on implementing them strictly.